Through the Mind's Eye
In recent years, I've been developing a more "wholistic" view of life. I've seen an interconnectedness in life and nature that I don't think I realized existed before. In my explorations with relgion and spirituality, I found a connection between body, mind, and spirit, that I think can be very powerful. Now that I'm dealing with this new challenge - the whole "being sick" thing - I find that the connection between those seemingly different aspects of my being are even more important. The thing that is tricky is that this illness is autoimmune. So, by definition, my body is attacking itself. It's a strange concept. Here I am, attempting to do right by my body - ingest whole and organic foods, quiet and still my mind, meditate and center my soul - all in an attempt to get my body to love itself again.
When you get a cold or a virus, it's realatively easy to imagine this vile "intruder" in your body. I've known cancer survivors who speak of the power of visualization... seeing cancer cells being obliterated by their medications in a kind of Rambo meets alien invader sci-fi flick. That sort of visualization doesn't seem to work for me with Wegener's. Like so many illnesses with no prevention, many autoimmune diseases don't have any real cause. There might be triggers, or predispositions, but no real cause. So in those moments, when I'm trying to imagine myself healthy and happy and at peace, I have to quiet that part of my mind that knows that my body is truly attacking itself. I have to try to integrate those fractured parts of my being that seem to be at odds and avoid blaming the parts of myself that seem to be causing this.
During a recent trip to Austin, Mike and I came across a Buddhist temple. Buddhism, specifically Zen Buddhism, is a philosophy that Mike and I have both embraced during the last few years. As we walked into the temple, we encountered a petite Chinese monk wrapped in red robes with a shaved head. I have never seen a being so filled with peace, comfort, and light. She almost seemed to float across the smooth tile of the temple with a serenity that left me awed and inspired. She gently and kindly offered us rest and water. When she asked how she could help us, Mike told her that I was sick and that he was seeking prayers and assistance. She guided us through the offering of incense and allowed us time for quiet meditation. Then, she and Mike took a walk and spoke for a while. They had a great conversation about seeking peace and looking for comfort in times of trial.
I found this quote on a website that deals with Buddhism and healing: "The Buddhist approach to health and healing is its emphasis on spiritual practice. Buddhism asserts that spiritual practice makes it possible for an individual not only to see opportunity for practice in the face of adversity, including sickness and injury, but use the opportunity for personal transformation and transcendence." This balance among the physical, psychological, and spiritual elements of human existence is the definition of health. So as I try to calm my mind and spirit through meditation practice and reflection, I'm finding that this experience is actually helping me reach a higher level of understanding of my own life journey.
When you get a cold or a virus, it's realatively easy to imagine this vile "intruder" in your body. I've known cancer survivors who speak of the power of visualization... seeing cancer cells being obliterated by their medications in a kind of Rambo meets alien invader sci-fi flick. That sort of visualization doesn't seem to work for me with Wegener's. Like so many illnesses with no prevention, many autoimmune diseases don't have any real cause. There might be triggers, or predispositions, but no real cause. So in those moments, when I'm trying to imagine myself healthy and happy and at peace, I have to quiet that part of my mind that knows that my body is truly attacking itself. I have to try to integrate those fractured parts of my being that seem to be at odds and avoid blaming the parts of myself that seem to be causing this.
During a recent trip to Austin, Mike and I came across a Buddhist temple. Buddhism, specifically Zen Buddhism, is a philosophy that Mike and I have both embraced during the last few years. As we walked into the temple, we encountered a petite Chinese monk wrapped in red robes with a shaved head. I have never seen a being so filled with peace, comfort, and light. She almost seemed to float across the smooth tile of the temple with a serenity that left me awed and inspired. She gently and kindly offered us rest and water. When she asked how she could help us, Mike told her that I was sick and that he was seeking prayers and assistance. She guided us through the offering of incense and allowed us time for quiet meditation. Then, she and Mike took a walk and spoke for a while. They had a great conversation about seeking peace and looking for comfort in times of trial.
I found this quote on a website that deals with Buddhism and healing: "The Buddhist approach to health and healing is its emphasis on spiritual practice. Buddhism asserts that spiritual practice makes it possible for an individual not only to see opportunity for practice in the face of adversity, including sickness and injury, but use the opportunity for personal transformation and transcendence." This balance among the physical, psychological, and spiritual elements of human existence is the definition of health. So as I try to calm my mind and spirit through meditation practice and reflection, I'm finding that this experience is actually helping me reach a higher level of understanding of my own life journey.
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