Along for the Ride

In recent weeks, I've been thinking about ways that I could help myself "get happy". I think dealing with any kind of chronic illness or ongoing stress can cause us all to get a little bleary-eyed and tired from time to time, so over the last few weeks, I've been sort of cataloging a list in my mind of little tricks that make me happy. Anytime I feel that things are slipping out of my control - whether it's from the uncertainty of a medical prognosis, the unknowns of future job and financial situations, or general "blahs" from life - these are little tricks that seem to help me keep my chin up. While I would love to say that I'm able to maintain a Zen-like level of calm at all times, meditating on things as they occur, sometimes I just need some distractions to keep that spring in my step. I'm always looking for more great ideas, so please feel free to comment with your own "get happy" tricks! 1. Take a walk outside. Even 10-15 m...

Today I had a chance to meet with my nephrologist for a follow-up appointment. It had only been 1 1/2 weeks since my last visit, which is a little shorter than my 2 week normal, so I wasn’t sure what to expect. At my last visit, my doctor and I had been discouraged by my lab results, which showed a significant jump in creatinine numbers (aka kidney impairment). All day long, I was a little agitated and nervous, and I was afraid that I’d be getting another blow this afternoon. My “threshold” to dialysis is getting a little too close for comfort, so I was relieved this afternoon when I saw my results. Finally, some good news!!! My doctor was very encouraged because my creatinine levels seem to have stabilized a bit. At this point, I’ve been “on meds” since Jan. 18, so we’re about 6 weeks into treatment. He was so happy with my numbers that he’s even thinking of reducing my prednisone dosage a bit - if my numbers continue to hold where they are - in the next 2-4 weeks. The stero...

As I’ve been looking back over the last few years, searching for clues about where this mysterious disease seems to have come from, all of the pieces seem to fit together in an eerie way. I graduated from my undergrad and started teaching in 2001. Over the course of the next 3-4 years, I lived alone, started my master’s degree, and began the “search” for my soul mate. After MANY creepy coffee dates from match.com, I met Mike. We fell in love long-distance, talking for hours on the phone or IM every night. He lived in Austin, and I lived in Plano, so I became one of those weekend road warriors, loading up Fred the Ford with Mardi the Mutt and my overnight bag every weekend to barrel down I-35 to go visit Mike. Just months into our relationship, we knew things were developing seriously, and we were already planning the next stages of our relationship. By 2005, we were engaged, and in 2006, we got married in McKinney. Around that time, my father had started showing some mysteriou...

So before I get too far into this whole “blogging” thing, I figured it would probably be appropriate to do a little background. I’ve blogged before, but not extensively. Primarily, I’ve used blogs as a non-confrontational way to explore spirituality and my thoughts/musings on religion with friends and family. While I think there may be something inherently narcissistic about personal blogging, in recent months I’ve come to realize that my close friends and family really do want to hear about how things are going, and a blog seems to be a sensible place to house those thoughts. I’ve also heard incredible stories of people going through their own medical mysteries, so perhaps my story can help. I’ve decided to call this blog the Amazing Adventures of Thelma & Louise because it will probably focus around the experiences I share with my two leading ladies of the moment, my left (Thelma) and right (Louise) kidneys. I do realize that it probably sounds a bit “off” to not only name...

The full moon symbolizes the height of one’s power, the peak of clarity, and the fulfillment of desire. While I do realize that my “full moon” face is simply a side-effect of high-dose steroids, I find the symbolism particularly fitting. This is the moment for me to seek the highest level of strength and power from within myself, foster clarity of spirit, and pursue stillness and quiet of mind so I can hear and follow my innermost desires. May my moon remain full and strong in my journey…

This morning we had a meeting at work to discuss - among other things - school finance. Topics on the agenda included an upcoming reduction in force and the fact that teachers won’t be getting raises. Add in a sure-fire increase in medical premiums, and I suppose I can actually look forward to making less next year than this year. Normally, this information would have incensed me. I would have left the meeting riled up and ready for a fight, yapping off the ears of anyone unfortunate enough to come in my path with my frustrations about not being taken seriously and the dangers to the public education system. While I’m certainly not at the point of apathy, I found myself filled with a certain level of calm. I immediately starting thinking… “I have a job. It’s a secure job. Someone has to teach the kids. Mike has a job. We have health insurance. We have a roof over our heads. We have food to eat, clothes to wear, and people who love us.” Then I looked at my arms and actual...